Potential.

Yes folks, scary word there. Unfortunately I'm not the type to count my chickens before they hatch. Well, actually I am, that's probably why I'm mentioning it at all.

So like, there's this girl. This girl is quite spiff. Spiff to the max. Spifferific. Then there's this boy. Boy has always known girl was spiff. Somewhere in here should be a line about boy and girl fall in love and live happily ever after.

Alas.

Outside forces currently prevent such happy endings. On top of those outside forces, boy will soon be going poof. Poor boy.

It's really strange. Like a few weeks ago I had various conversations with various friends after spending some time with said girl, and did all this talking about how frustrated I was with these "outside forces" and how I was going to just forget the whole thing. I figured that would be best, I'd leave, I'd eventually find someone else to hold my attention, and the earth would keep turning. I even went so far as to make a bet with my friend that I wouldn't talk about said girl until I left. Needless to say I'll be treating her to ice cream as a result at some point.

I must fess up, some of the recent entries in this blog have been kept out of the public eye, and instead just added into the Word document I use as backup. Unfortunately not everything can be talked about here. But I can try to explain what I'm thinking at the moment.

So what am I thinking. Hm. In the past few years, I've been doing the single thing. I've actually had a few encounters with people who were interested in more than a friendship, and had the unwanted task of turning them down. There just was never anything there. It's funny, poets, authors, and playwrights have been for centuries trying to describe what it's like to find "the one" or someone who could be "the one."

At times I can be pretty naive. Compared with many of those around me, I tend to be on the optimistic side of the scale. With regards to some things though, I'm quite the opposite.

I came to a conclusion this weekend, as I had the time of my life. There is always a possibility that at some point during my life I will find someone that is at this girl's level. However I personally feel I will never find someone above her. A lot of people will respond with "oh everyone who has a crush says that." Unfortunately I can't exactly call this a crush. She's been in my life for a decade. That's a long time. Unfortunately, there was a significant gap in our communication over the years.

This involves a really long story that I really shouldn't get into. Let's just say at one point, I was in the perfect relationship. Abruptly, it ended. The reason it ended, is no longer valid, or relevant, and has been proven so through time. Slowly, trust was regained. A friendship was built, and since then I've been happy as a clam. Always satisfied with the way things were, but never satisfied with the way things were. Always wondering, if what was once perfect could eventually be regained. Always waiting for that second chance.

I am unfortunately the slowest mover on the planet. Agressive is just not in my vocabulary. This ended up costing me, as the time ticked by, and the door began to crack open, I lost that chance, again. Had I grasped it, things might be different now. But I didn't, and it passed me by. Whether there will ever be another chance has been a constant thought. This is when I decided that it was hopeless, I'd screwed up again, and should move on and try to forget about it. This was of course, fruitless.

This is going to sound pretty sappy, but there's no way to butter it down, so to speak. I looked at my watch a bunch of times while I was at Six Flags this weekend. Normally, when I do this it's because I want to know what time it is. This time, every time it was because I wanted to know how much time I had left. Unfortunately, when distance is involved, the time two people spend together is always limited. There's always a countdown until someone leaves, immediately followed by a countdown until they're together again. The trying times in between are what break up the majority of relationships. While in college especially, the concept of wanting to be committed, rather than be out partying every night enjoying the single life, is generally foreign. After this weekend, I've decided I'm so past that, it's unbelievable. As much as I try to put up a facade that I enjoy the ability to "play the field," and tell my friends the same, I don't. It's probably been some time since I was over it.

This weekend while spending time with her, I couldn't help but imagine that we were together. The things we did, the way we talked, the closeness I felt, opened wide a door that's been shut, but never locked, for years. I literally loved every single second. I literally felt like I was sharing love with someone else. Most importantly, I felt those same feelings were returned in equal portions. The time passed like nothing. Lines just disappeared. Hours flew by. On the freeway during the ride home, all I kept thinking whenever I saw an exit, was how few exits there were left before I'd be dropping her off and drive away, alone. I really sound lame. How often is a person willing to drive hundreds of miles in a two day period just to spend a short amount of time with a friend? Willing to talk on the phone all hours of the night, and then at a single request, drop everything, get in the car and drive hours to see them? I don't think anyone would call this normal friendship behavior. There's no one else currently in my life who can make me feel the way she does. All she has to do is open the door, and give me a smile, and wham, cloud nine. Just the thought of exchanging smiles would get me barrelling toward LA. She exudes a warmth that is unlike any other. Sigh. I guess gushing doesn't help the situation all that much.

Which brings us to the issue at hand. "Outside forces" is about as descriptive as I can be without talking about anything I shouldn't be. Basically, something in her life would have to change in order for me to be a bigger part of it. Actually, there's more than one challenge involved, none of which are easy. Previously, I've always looked at them as barriers, things that wouldn't ever be overcome, and reasons why I'd never again be with her. Now, I see them as challenges, difficulties much like those faced in any relationship. The really crazy thing here, is I'm willing to change personally to accomodate many of them. For those who know me, change is not a simple thing for me. I almost always order the same food, get the same smoothie, walk the same way to class, park in the same spot, put my keys in the same place on my desk. Seriously though, if she asked me to change any of the above, or anything else about my life, I'd probably do it. If it really wasn't doable, I'd at least compromise. How sad is that, most of my friends would get some response along the lines of "yeah right, you're dreaming" whereas with her I'd have the mindset of "sacrifices must be made."

So why the sudden optimism about the situation? Well, I finally feel like this isn't a one way street. I feel she feels the feelings I feel. Great word selection there. A few of my friends when hearing about this have made the comment that "she might be playing you." Again, call me the most naive person alive, but I'm convinced that's not the case. I think a half a decade later we're back where we once were, and are one step short of what we once had. When I looked into her eyes, I felt her looking into mine the same way.

Boy am I babbling.

So what am I doing now. Well I have two midterms Thursday, some randomness I'm sure this weekend, another Monday and another Wednesday. So i'll be mostly in the books, while the days sort of pass by. Meanwhile a hundred miles away she's preparing for finals, graduation, and a trip across the country. We might see each other somewhere in between all that. We might not, and that's not something I can control very well. Forty six days from now I graduate. Potentially within ten days of that, I'll be driving away. Far, far away, with the miles growing with every step.

There's really one of two possibilities here.

I leave with a picture, which captured a moment in time where life was perfect. Ten weeks later, and whenever possible after that, I will return, to find that person who shared the moment, and create many more. I'd leave again sure, but I'd always come back. Regardless of distance, time, or troubles, my committed feelings would not waver. I would know that we wouldn't be separated forever.

The second possibility, is I leave alone. With a car full of my life and a tank full of gas, I'd head far away from my childhood home. Eager to meet my future, apprehensive about what it might bring, but hopeful that the perfect kind of happiness will eventually find me.

I'd love to say I was in charge here. But I'm not. I think it's obvious which possibility would make a dream come true, and which is really an open ended story.

So there you have it, it's out there. One of the reasons I haven't talked about it before is because it basically closes out anyone else. All I can say is this is who my focus is on right now, and I don't see that changing any time soon.

Edit: Although I'm a brutally honest person, and thus don't have a problem with letting people know how I feel about any topic in a public way, this doesn't mean that I'm comfortable discussing an issue such as this with anyone who happens to read about it. I'm sure literally everyone who reads has an opinion, and at times find it pretty difficult to refrain from voicing it. It's generally safer to wait for me to bring it up, so I don't have to make you feel bad by telling you I'm not comfortable discussing it with you. If you feel lucky go for it, but the disclaimer is there.

Best Weekend Ever.

Like, ridiculously good. It was one of "those." Friday night at midnight be on the phone, receive a request, get in the car to fulfill it. This time it was cough drops for someone who was sick. The person just happened to be a hundred something miles away. What can I say, when I'm bored on a weekend, I'm willing to do a whole lot of things most people don't even consider.

So yeah, spent the majority of the weekend with this person, and had a better time than I've had in literally months. I could not have asked for anything more. Just what I needed, just when I needed it. Currently, life rocks.

Perhaps slightly less generic details later, I'm pretty tired, not much sleep was involved.

LALALA.... Boring.

Boy do I feel sorry for my loyal readers lately. I need to like, have a hot passionate weekend or something to give me something to spam about. Oh wait, I probably wouldn't put that in here. Sadness.

I've been informed writing about running is boring. Well.

Unfortunately the story of my life for the next two months can basically be summed up in one series of words. Sleep, wake up, flounder, go running, do reps, shower, eat, flounder, class in there somewhere, read, read some more, play a game or two, flounder, watch tv, maybe read some more, sleep. I see friends here and there, but rarely outside of meals it seems like. Mondays continue to be profitable, but one night a week does not a social life make. Word on the street is a Red Rock hiking/swimming trip is planned for Saturday though, and there's potential for Magic Mountain on Sunday given the plans a couple weeks ago got "washed away" somewhow... It's kind of sad, I'm either getting work done, or my mind is nagging at me that I should be getting work done. I did find out when my last two midterms are, and I actually only have them in 4 of my 5 classes, with the first one not being until a week from today. So while everyone else crams I still have plenty of time, and am moving right along with my reading schedule.

Hey, one of you, out there. AREN'T YOU BORED TOO? Come knock at the window already, GEEZ.

Chocolate Soothes the Soul.

I actually think the above is a load of horse doodoo. Maybe I'm just not a huge chocolate fan. It's sweet, but more than like two pieces and the stomach goes swirling. Hm.

Ran a 66 second 400 on Saturday, my fastest thus far, and amazingly close to the 64 second or so lap I ran in high school. Course then by the end of the workout my hamstrings were cramping so bad I couldn't even run the last 100. I stretched an excessive amount afterwards and all was well though. I did the same before my workout on Sunday, and even though the sprints were longer, I didn't have any crampage. What I did have was leg soreness in general, probably just because between Sat and Sun I don't have the usual day's rest. I managed to complete the 4x600 workout in a combined time of 8:59, which although it can't really be compared, is a significant drop off my official 10:21 1.5 mile time. I'm always itching to see what my 1.5 mile has dropped to whenever I workout, but I figure watching the sprint times drop will be satisfying enough. The nine minute mark will actually be my goal for the most part, it would require a 6 minute mile pace for all 2400, which as of yet is not possible, but is definitely within the horizon.

We actually have a movie review for the first time in a while, as my friend was nice enough to take me to see The Hours. One thing I really gotta comment on is the music. I know it was nominated for some Oscars, and I'm not sure if score was one of them, but the music really played a large role. There's no dialogue for the first several minutes, but this haunting piano riff just dominates all the scenes. The piano is the major piece used throughout, and really helped set the tone of the movie. Speaking of tone, this is definitely not a picker upper. Can't say a whole lot without giving away plot elements, although it's pretty cut and dry, and is one of those show the end at the beginning types, and it's obvious that's what they're doing. Still though it kept me interested throughout the two hours, which is sometimes more difficult than it seems.

It's Monday, you know what that means.

Hm, Days Past?

Strange. It's not like I've been doing all that much.

I did have my last 4x400 workout yesterday before I move up to 4x600's starting tomorrow, which went quite well. I can now say I can officially run as fast as I did in high school, sort of. The sort of being I was running the sprints with 200 yard rests in between, whereas in high school as part of the mile I would have ran the 1600 all at once. But my times are comparable. So once I build up the endurance, wahoo. That was the first workout I ever really cramped up afterwards, like it even hurts to sit down because your hamstrings are just dying. I've been doing really good stretching sessions both before and after the workouts though, so there isn't any soreness. I still get occasional soreness in my shins, but almost always because I'm running on pavement for long periods rather than the track. Either that or at the very beginning of the warmup, before I've properly stretched and such. I'm very happy about my progress.

Upcoming weeks get pretty ugly. The setup is Tuesday Thursday Saturday Sunday, with Thursday and Sunday being the heavier workouts of 4x400 for example last week, and Tuesday and Saturday being shorter speed workout such as 1x400, 1x300, 1x200, 1x100. Sounds easy, but if you're really bookin it, it's still pretty draining. That and you have to tack on a mile or two afterward as a warmdown, which is really good for getting used to running while absolutely dead. It doesn't really leave any time for seeing how my 1.5 mile time improves as I go, but it should be pretty obvious as the workouts lengthen. This week I go to 4x600, and then as the weeks pass it goes to 4x800 (this should be bad), 4x1000 (this should definitely be the worst one), 8x400, and 8x600 (um, gasp). The final two weeks of the schedule I've been working at actually tone down the workouts, maybe to just maintain the level of endurance rather than overdo it. Basically has you run the first rep at top speed, literally race pace, and then still do a few more lengthy reps after that, such as 1x1000, 1x1000, 1x300, or the final one of 1x1400, 1x1000. One thing I should mention is in these later weeks the rest period between the reps is a mere 25 or 50 meters, whereas in previous weeks such as the 4x1000 the rest was up to 400 meters. Basically as the distances increase, the rests decrease. Easy way to build endurance I suppose. So somewhere down the line in about 7 weeks I should be in pretty awesome shape when it comes to running the 1x2400 (1.5 mile) I'll be scored on.

Hm, have I babbled enough about running yet, yeah I suppose.

Meanwhile I'm sticking to my reading schedule, although I have a bunch to catch up on this weekend. I felt pretty trashy today, think I missed a day of Centrum a couple days ago and got your typical common cold. Did get some sun in, and got a really funny squarish shaped sunburn in the middle of my back where I guess I couldn't reach with the lotion. It's small though, just kinda funny.

I went over and bought all the graduation stuff required, including announcements, the cap and gown rental, the diploma cover, and all the stuff they end up basically forcing you to buy with it. I also decided to splurge on a ring, for as I also said in high school when I bought that one, I'll probably only buy three rings in my life, one of which I won't even get to wear, so I might as well buy the other two. It's dang spiff if you ask me, but of course won't get shipped until just before graduation, so I can't enjoy it just yet. Hearing all the workers over there say congratulations to me like eighty times for graduating sort of caused it to start sinking in, but given how much work I have left to do, I don't think it'll be until the end of that last final that I can truly enjoy it. Meanwhile, rise, run, rep, eat, class, read, sleep, repeat as necessary.

Man, I slept like ten hours last night, took at least a three hour nap, and am now probably going to easily sleep through the night again. I really need to get better and get back into eight hours a day and feeling great.

Two Days and a Hundred Years Later...

It's funny how sometimes when you finally sit down and look at where you're at, and figure out everything that's wrong with the way things are, it makes it so much easier to see what's right.

I've had a really good couple of days, spent with really awesome people. Yesterday someone came to visit me in my room, which is always a pleasant surprise. She stayed for quite a while, and we just talked about this that and the other thing. She's just a very cheerful person, and it's so easy to crack a smile whenever I'm around her. We eventually went to dinner which I inhaled given I was to meet a friend at the 154 for our usual Monday night jaunt at 5:30. I was even sly enough to jack a full sandwich from Carrillo to eat on the way back which worked out nicely. It was raining, but I actually like driving in the rain. Much less monotonous. Chumash for the second week in a row was kind, with me walking out being up a total three times what I walked out up with last week, which is of course even better. Going to be pretty tough to triple the winnings next week, but you never know. Unfortunately for the four of us playing in the tournament, no one made it past the first round, although we all had "big fish" stories to pass around. I personally think I got robbed worse than anyone, with a 19 on the last hand while all in against a dealer 8, which then became a 16. Thus any card other than a 3, 4, or 5, and I would have won. Ten out of thirteen times I'd have gone to the second round, unfortunately this was one of the three times I wouldn't with a 3 popping and making the old lady's day at the other side of the table. All four of us had fighting chances in the last hand though, so it was a shame no one went on. By my count though I've played probably in about 8-10 tournaments costing me 40 or 50 bucks, and thus far have won $400 worth of winnings. Still a good $5 wager with a 10 to 1 return. On the way back since we had two cars involved due to one of my friends meeting us there since he works in Solvang, one of them was nice enough to ride with me back over the pass so I wouldn't have to go alone. We split up two and two and were off again through the rain, and I actually became engrossed in conversation the entire way back about my previous blog, the stage of life that I'm at, and just everything going on. She is actually in a somewhat similar situation and was able to relate, which was great. Was just good conversation, yet again.

Denny's was the flavor of the evening once we got back, and we had the usual fun making fun of my friend's special ordering that is quite extensive, with the usual reference to my previous joke about the fact she might as well "ask if they have a kangaroo in the kitchen." You kinda have to be there and in a certain mentality, but hey. I also found out the long distance phone card I've carried in my wallet for years expired in 2001 and has just been taking up space, go figure. Haha, I just typed fo gigure. That's hilarious. Anyway. Apple pie ala mode is the best. After more trash talk and storytelling alas it was time to head back, which was sad because it was now 11pm and I of course had homework due at 8. I'd had a great day though, so I decided to put it off til the morning and wake up mighty early. Before I did though, I got an IM from another friend wondering how the trip had gone and how I was doing, which was nice. She's definitely the person most like me that I've met this year, which makes her very easy to talk to. She'd swelled up her ankle like a balloon a day or two before, which really sucks, I remember the days of spraining stuff, it was never fun.

This morning 5:15am was when the watch went off, which was of course pretty obscenely early since I didn't actually hit it until around 1. I managed to get off my ass though, and better yet do the couple chapters of reading and understanding concepts required, and then figure out and finish up the homework, a half hour before it was due even. I even had time for breakfast! After a relatively uneventful class of going over stuff I'd already read (she collects homework at the end and despises people who come in at the end just to turn it in) I turned it in and headed over to the reccen and track. I've added an arm curl regiment to my workout, as that's one of the weightlifting exercises I'm a decent gap behind what I'm going to have to be at during fighter training. I figure biceps are easy to develop and look good anyway, so might as well get that started. The bench press will probably take care of itself as my push up reps climb into the several hundreds a week, but I'll probably check at some point to make sure I'm up where I need to be. Most everything else I'm already at the level I should be or beyond, so I'm not too worried. The track workout was pretty uneventful, other than feeling like I was going to die as usual. Managed to double the length of the warmdown, although it's still half the length of the recommended one. I've been doing the same initial week's sprint workouts for two weeks though to get better acquainted with that type of workout, so I should be up to speed next week. Lap times continue to fall.

So then I head off to my 11am which I was finally able to add last week. The lectures are pointless, but my main goal was to find someone with the reading list so I could copy it down. As it turned out the first guy I asked was extremely helpful, even letting me know about a homework assignment that's due a week from today and letting me copy down both it and the syllabus/reading list. With that info in hand and having scheduled out the reading for that class up through the midterm, and feeling much better about that class in general, I headed off to go check mail. That is when I stumbled upon my friend from my Writing 109 group, who I've run into now and again since then. Although she'd probably kill me for bringing it up again, she was the one who donated the golf ball sized bump to my forehead a few months ago during a heated racquetball match. :) Although we see each other occasionally, I really haven't been able to get to know her all that well until today. She was tabling for the Princeton Review, so I basically just kept her company when she wasn't helping a patron. I was initially only going to hang out for a little while, as I was hoping to get home and go to sleep immediately, not waking up until around 6 or something. As it was I ended up staying the entire time she was working, for no real reason at all other than the fact I was enjoying her company. I got to hear a lot of good stories about her life, and share some of my own, and it's weird, I just felt like I was actually getting to KNOW know her for the first time. Rather than just being a casual acquaintance, she actually feels like a friend now, you know? She's just an awesome person in general. It's bizarre, I go and complain about lacking these types of connections and then I just start falling into them left and right. Go figure.

I also must mention while I was outside the library one of my bestest friends stopped by as well, cheerful as ever. I don't get to see her too often since she lives off campus, so I value all the times I see her more than ever. She's just the type of person you wanna squeeeeeeeeesh whenever you see them.

So there you have it, Sunday I do all this whining about lacking real friends, and within two days six of the coolest kind make appearances. Life isn't all that bad.

Taking Stock.

I yoinked that heading off a sibling's blog, it just sort of fit what I'm trying to do here.

So I've been pretty irritated lately in general. It's just sort of come to a head this weekend because I got flaked on by a few friends who were supposed to go to Magic Mountain with me today but waited til the night before to decide against it. That, and like every single person I've talked to ends up annoying me. I'd call it PMS, but well, that wouldn't make much sense.

I had a phone conversation last night with someone for over two hours. I used to have those kinds of conversations all the time with people. Be it on the phone, or just sitting someplace, we'd talk about anything and everything, whatever was on our minds. I never felt like I was wasting time, I always felt I was gaining something. The people were smart, knew what they were talking about, and even if our opinions differed, helped me learn why. Those types of conversations seem like they're becoming fewer, and fewer. The conclusion I've come to is while in college, I just haven't really connected with anyone. There are a select few who I feel are on the same wavelength, but other than that, it's like I'm a stranger in a strange land. In high school these types were for some reason, easier to find. Many of them I still keep in touch with today, and whenever we meet up we end up just hanging out for hours. In college, everything seems forced. I do things with people because it's better than being alone, but I'm not necessarily happy hanging out with them either. Granted everyone I know could potentially take that last line personally, but if they do, they're clearly not one of the select few mentioned above.

This is probably all becoming more clear because of my impending departure. I am at a stage in my life where everything will soon be changing, and I will be too. It's actually quite sad, although I still see myself keeping in touch with literally a dozen people I met in high school while I'm away, I really don't see that happening with those I've met in college. A few sure, but given the dozens I've become acquainted with here, the fraction is miniscule. People just don't seem like they're on the same page. I know where I'm going in life, I know what I'm doing, I know how to get there, I know what's required, I have the motivation, and I'm on my way. Most people I know, are just stagnant. They don't know what to do with their lives, what comes after college, or why they're doing what they are already. Some are more concerned with whether or not their significant other remembered an anniversary than whether or not the US is at war.

That's the other sad thing. I'd love to say that I thought all of my friend's relationships were going to last forever, but call me a pessimist, or a hater, or bitter, or whatever, but some just make me laugh. That someone can possibly be so shallow as to think that it will actually work in the long run, that they will actually get married and have kids some day. I'm not going to go into specifics, and given almost every single one of my friends here is in a relationship of one stage or another I'm not speaking for the whole, but some people are just being stupid. Yeah, it's my opinion, yeah, I may be proven wrong. I just wouldn't put money I earned on the happier ever after result.

When someone is that engrossed in something doomed to fail, it just makes me feel detached from them in general. If they're willing to expend all this energy on a waste of time, then are they really going to go anywhere in life? Am I ever actually going to learn anything from that kind of person, or are they just dragging me down? The obvious defense is I haven't dated in college, so I don't know what I'm missing. My phone conversation last night was with someone who over the past few years has run into a few unfortuante circumstances with a few different members of the opposite sex. Although we are near the same age in our lives, they have taken a much more proactive stance when it comes to trying to find a relationship that works, while I have not. In a way, the person has taken what has come to them, and only later found out it wasn't the ideal situation. Whereas I've simply been the most picky person ever, not even making the effort unless there's extremely long term potential. Arguments can be waged for both strategies. One causes pleasure follow by pain, but you learn as you go. The latter merely means you don't date until you find one of "the" ones. It was interesting, as we talked it seemed we both were leaning towards using the other person's strategy, due I suppose to the grass being greener on the other side. In reality though I don't know which of us has ended up better off.

It's been close to three years since I've been in any kind of serious relationship. Three years of college mind you, which I've spent surrounded by thousands of people my own age. How is it possible I haven't found someone on my level, seeing things on the same wavelength, being at the same stage in their life? I have no idea. Granted, there's still time. Also granted, I'm leaving, but seriously, if I thought the person was the best thing that ever happened to be, distance would not be an issue, and neither would time. I've done it before, and I'd do it again.

But alas, the challenge is the search, and the chase. Meanwhile I'll keep meeting people who are more worried about what they're going to wear, or how many pounds they need to lose, or why President Bush is an idiot for wanting to kill American soldiers on purpose so he can get more gas for his SUVs. I suppose I could give a long drawn out rebuttal to why these people are stupid, but frankly, if they're stupid enough to think it's true in the first place, it's not like saying something to deaf ears will improve anything.

I'm often asked what single value I'd look for in a partner, and honesty always comes first. Everything begins with trust. I've never really thought about the second one though. Based on all this, I'd have to say ambition comes next . That's one of the most admirable qualities a person can have.

Are you out there? You who actually has a clue? You who know where you're going in life, have a plan, and are making it happen? You who are actually informed, intelligent, and ambitious? You who will always be teaching me, as well as always be learning? If so, please feel free to contact me. I'll be waiting.

Okay Children Gather Round.

I'm going to tell you how to play a very fun game. It's called "Chase the Add Code." It has been occupying my time over the last several days as we have now reached the end of the second week of classes.

See, you spend all four years of college looking forward to the quarter you are a graduating senior. Why you ask? Because that's when you have the highest priority when crashing a class. If a class is full, especially in the econ department, they generally close it after a certain number of days from the beginning of the quarter, and then the ONLY way to add it is via a four digit add code. It doesn't matter if there are spaces on GOLD, our registration system, unless you have a code. The codes are turned over from the department to the professors, who can then at their discretion add the people they want. In most cases, the people are prioritized by number of units, so that those seniors who need the class for graduation are able to add it first, and those freshmen who will have years to take it another time get shafted. However, you might get really lucky. You might have say, 171 units, and be only 9 units off the required total for graduation. You'd think with that total, you'd have an exceptionally high priority. You'd figure most classes would have plenty of add codes to give out, and you'd be safe getting any class you wanted. You'd of course, be wrong. I made the mistake of thinking I was going to be able to add a course on personnel economics, the one I was looking forward to taking because the professor was actually coherent. As it turned out, he wasn't going to add anyone over the fifty person limit for the class, because he uses two labs for the midterm and final which are computer based, and there are only fifty computers. Thus, he only had two add codes he was going to give out. Still I attended a few more classes, expecting to be one of the two, before finding out on Tuesday that the two unit totals receiving the codes were 213 and 208. I was under the impression they kicked you out after 200 units. Apparently not. So, for two days I scrounged around for basically anything that was upper division econ that I could add so I could graduate. Eventually I went over to the Phelps labs to actually check out the computer situation for myself, and discovered there were in fact 26 computers in each lab. Armed with this information, I eventually tracked down the professor's office hours, and sat outside the room for an hour waiting for them, as they happened to be the same day. "Not all of them might be working on test day" was what he told me. So I notice that he is also teaching 100C this quarter, and ask him if he's adding people to that. All too willingly, he gives me a code immediately. I'm at first ecstatic, but decide this is a little strange. I log on and check the syllabus. "This course is aimed at students with a serious interest in economics (as distinct from business), who may be considering graduate study in that field." Uh oh. That is so not me. I read more. "Some of the material we will be reading is very advanced ... economic research in its original form of journal articles ... everyone will be called upon and expected to participate since the class size is small ... thursdays I will randomly call on you to present your answer to the discussion questions or to discuss the supplementary reading" Basically worst case scenario here in my book. Luckily after a few days of e-mails, I manage to get an appointment with another professor who teaches 106 and 114 for today at 10am. I show up and basically give him a partially true story about how I was enrolled in his class, and then dropped it, and later tried to readd but couldn't because it had been closed. In reality it was because I tried to add 152, and got shut down. He asks if I'm a graduating senior and when I'm graduating, and then gives me the predictable line of how he's had literally dozens of people he's had to say no to. Then however, to my utter amazement, he pulls a sheet out of a drawer and says that one person who he was going to give one to didn't show up, so he has one last code to give out, and might as well give it to me.

As of about 11am this morning, I am finally enrolled in 20 units. Of course I had to go get a refund for the 152 book, and by the 106 book for the second time (which was a little more expensive) but it's a small price to pay. Friday has been a very good day. Thank goodness. Now all I have to do is get some decent grades. Oh by the way, I've heard from inside sources that basically no one gets below an A or a B in 106, so it's nice that 106 was the one that I ended up with. That's now three classes that should be automatic B's or better, with the other two looking fine as well. Eight weeks to go.

Some Shoutouts.

This'll be fun. Some shoutouts to those I know, in completely random order. If you can guess which one's you, huge amazement points.

Shoutouts...
To the blue jean baby.
To the luscious lips.
To my polar opposite.
To the retard.
To a great mind.
To the star.
To the one I miss.
To big red.
To the dreamer.
To the blinks.
To my partner in crime.
To the late night rendezvous.
To the old one.
To the older one.

And no, I'm not telling.
While I'm at it, a shoutout to myself...
To the dork.

Sunny, but DAMNIT WIND!

These past few days I've been getting my sunbathing on, but unfortunately the wind has made it more difficult than I'd like. I actually never did talk about the trip I took to the beach the day after I got here, which was a lot of fun. Although I was forced to show off the interesting tank top shaped tanlines I have from hiking last summer, it was the beginning of trying to get back to a monochrome exterior. Four of us ended up making the fifty yard or so walk that takes you from my front door to the water's edge, and took a tennis ball so we could all destroy most of our arm muscles trying to show each other up, and then whine all through the day following about what's sore. I eventually had the pleasure of being buried by two fine young women, a rare opportunity I of course took advantage of. Reminded me of the ol childhood days. The only thing I didn't do was dig a huge hole, but the sand was packed pretty hard with water not too far under, so a significantly deep hole wouldn't have been possible. Unfortunately much of the recent attempts at sunbathing have been thwarted by the gusting winds, which tend to slam the sand into you like thousands of tiny needles while you like there not bothering it at all. The gusts actually got up above 35 mph one of the days last week, which is impressive enough to make it pretty rough biking back and forth, especially in a crosswind as you try to avoid the retard freshmen on their cell phones.

They also finally opened up the pool here in the complex, which should be quite nice. Already invaded the place a few times, and it's nice not having to go all the way to the RecCen to get my swim on. Yeah seriously, how spoiled am I, half a mile via bike is too far, fifty yards is the maximum effort I'm willing to put out. Sad. I actually have been following some periodization schedules put together by a fitness trainer and incoming Officer Trainee who frequents one of the OTS forums I keep up with, which have been good for keeping me on track for hitting my goals in the running and strength events. Now I just have to keep with it, and watch the reps pile on and the minutes pile off.

Darn, was gonna post this before midnight, I flunk!

Doh.

I wore the same pair of jeans today and yesterday, and it was only tonight that I noticed the long size sticker was still on the side of my right thigh. Almost two full days and either no one noticed, or no one told me. I'm guessing the latter happened more often than I'd like. Sadness.

Finally Friday.

This week has officially been the longest ever. Mainly because I've been going to even more classes than I've been scheduled for, trying to decide which ones I want to take. After talking with the econ department I found out that you can basically take any six econ upper division electives you want, which is contrary to what the business economics major sheet says, which acts like it has to be two from each of three groups. This would have been really useful information last quarter, I could have actually been taking things I thought were really interesting rather than stuff just to fill requirements. So given this new freedom I checked out just about all the possible classes before deciding what to add.

I finally settled on two of my classes because I had the teacher last quarter, you just read a whole lot and then write an essay test midterm and final, and if you know what you're talking about you get at least a B, which was my grade last quarter. I don't mind reading, the classes are right after each other MWF in the same room at 8 and 9, so no real effort is required other than the usual getting up early. One is on the economics of ancient civilizations like Egypt and the Middle East (111), which is interesting, and the other is on the economics of Europe prior to 1850 (112A), which isn't really. Given prior to 1850 means everything from 8000 BC really, and economics didn't even really exist until much later, thus far it has been mostly a history class. History is somewhat interesting though, and easy to absorb and write about, so I'll live. The one required class I had to take was 134A which is Corporate Finance, in which all the lecture notes are online as well as the reading that should be done out of a decently fat book. The concepts don't seem altogether difficult, and there are weekly homeworks assigned but not graded for which the solutions are given, so that will keep me on top of what's going on and prevent me from falling behind. Then there's personnel economics (152) which was a really great find. The teacher is coherent, and not only can I understand what he's saying, but I can read what he writes on the board. These are two very rare qualities in professors these days. He goes through the usual concepts and formulas, but then also even throws in numerical exampls to make everything much clearer. Usually teachers of this kind of class give you all the boring derivation of the formula that no one cares about but is "more important" and then leave you on your own to figure out how to use it. Given that's what you're tested on, it's quite annoying. So yes, this guy rocks, and the class's concepts seem easy to learn. Last on the list we have um... Man there have been so many it takes me forever to figure out what the fifth one is every time I try to describe my schedule. It's 180 which is International Trade. My 8am TR class, this is taught by a female professor who clearly knows what she's talking about. She moves pretty quick, but thus far the concepts have all been based on what I already learned when studying Global Economics in AcaDec. Actually I'm pretty sure the whole class will be a review, barring some more in depth topics. I'm tellin ya, the knowledge from AcaDec will be helpin me forever it seems like. Unfortunately aerodynamics and aviation weren't subjects, so during my training I'll be learning as I go.

So there ya have it, twenty units with 8am every day. Whee. Three sections even, when barely any upper division lectures have sections. Lucky me. But it should go alright, unlike last quarter there is no real class where it's like "wonder what I'm going to get in here cuz I have no clue" type situation. Obviously I'll know more after the first set of midterms, of which I think I have like three on the same day. Always nice. The good news is I got out of having three finals on the same day, which would have been much worse. Instead they're all over the place with one on Monday at 11am, two Wednesdays at 8am and 7:30pm, as well as two 8ams on Thursday and Friday. So having three 8am finals on the last three days of finals would usually be lame, but given I'm doing that all quarter it will be nothing new. Besides which I have to stay around for commencement anyway, so it's not like the last final is keeping me here anyway. Would have been nice to have a few days to enjoy myself though.

I'm almost caught up in writing about what I've been up to, prolly by tomorrow will be all up to date and can start writing about things when they happen instead of weeks later, yay!

SREEPEE!

I'd blog a bunch more, but I promised myself I'd finally go to bed before midnight and actually get a full eight hours of sleep rather than the seemingly more common four or five. More in the morning.

Geez, Life Busy Blows.

Okay so if I don't start catching up with this I apparently never will, so here we go.

Last Friday (am I really this far behind, so sad) I headed up to Snow Summit again for my second snowboarding trip of Spring Break. This time I went with my father, who is a self proclaimed "mastur skier." We got there basically as early as possible, and were greeted with pretty much large slopes of uncut ice. For those who have tried snowboarding on ice, it's really not the prettiest picture. Luckily as time went on the sun gave it a decent slushy type surface, which made it about a hundred times easier to dig into the curves on the steep stuff. Ended up spending a great deal of my time on the "Miracle Mile" as they call it, one of the intermediate runs down from the top, with relatively steep sections thrown in. Confidence came even quicker than the previous trip, and I managed to find a better way to carve toe to heel edge than I had been previously by bending my knees a little more and changing my arm position.

Unfortunately not all was paradise, as I managed to suffer the worst accident yet in my relatively short lived thus far career in the snow. Was zipping along across one of the easier runs, when I came across a flat section all snowboarders know and love, where you are skimming along a sheet of ice in the shadow and then plow into a section of slush in the sun. I'm not even sure what exactly happened, as is generally is the case when you eat it while hauling ass. Something dug in, the momentum kept me flying forward, and eventually my board went flinging over my head as my arms flailed around in the air trying to break my fall. They didn't, and I dropped out of the sky to land square on my shoulder and eventually skid to a halt in a heap. The guy who had been following me chimed in with a "Holy sh**, that HAD to hurt, you alright dude?" and a few other people took notice, with my father eventually joining the party as well, having missed the entire thing while trying to avoid a tree further up or something. Luckily other than some major back soreness for a day or so there wasn't anything major wrong, and I was able to continue through the rest of the day. We ended up leaving before 1, which gets you something like twenty bucks off your next trip, which will be nice. It also doesn't seem to expire, so I'm sure I'll make use of it at some point, even if the weather doesn't improve enough for another trip this season. It did rain today, so who knows.

Driving up PCH on Sunday on one of the hottest days in a few months wasn't very intelligent, but apparently driving the 405 and 101 wouldn't have been much better, judging from the radio dj's description of the "worst traffic jam EVER" on the 405 North at Sunset. Ended up taking about three hours instead of under two like usual, but what can ya do. The ocean sure was beautiful in the meantime.

While I was at home I got to spend time with various high school friends I'll probably only see once more if at all before I leave, so that was nice. I'm not a real fan of goodbyes, but guess I'll have to get used to it pretty soon here.

I'm still in the process of deciding which of my classes to keep, as I found out I have a few more flexible options than I thought I did, so I'll finish updating on what I've been doing since I've been back a while later.

What, Did I Get A Life Or Something?

For once I actually have a lot to say but haven't gotten around to saying it. Strange. 8am classes every day this quarter will make things interesting, but Tuesdays and Thursdays will be especially interesting with class from 8-9:15, 11-12:15, 12:30-1:45, and 5-6:15. Wee. Will update somewhere in between all that mess.

It's Goin Back, Back, Back, To the Wall.... GONE!

Back to UCSB I go.

Finally.

After GOLD was down for maintenance all day, I was finally able to check my grades tonight, and low and behold the news was good. The studying paid off as I received the expected grades in all three Econ classes. So then there was one final quarter before graduation. The requirement is simple now, 2.54 or greater and I graduate. With five classes to work with, I really don't expect it to even be close. My intention is to be so satisfied with the way things are going into the final is even a worst case scenario wouldn't deter me. I plan to make frequent trips over to the gnome rooms and stay ahead of the game.

It's not like I need more motivation than the fact that I either graduate and move on with my life, or screw things up royally.

Today I spent some time downtown with a friend, at a new section just recently built called "The Grove." It's over behind CBS studios adjacent to the Farmer's Market, and is really a cool place. We had fun running around FAO Schwartz reliving our youth, and spent the mandatory half hour browsing around the multi-story Barnes and Noble. Eventually we made it over to the theater where we watched Bend it Like Beckham a film originally released in the U.K. but has made an appearance over here although not in wide release. She recommended it, I'd never heard of it, so of course I went in not expecting much. She said it was partly about soccer, so I figured it couldn't be that bad. As it was I was pleasantly surprised. The whole thing was really entertaining, with the plot basically revolving around a young Indian girl trying to rebel against the traditionalist parents by playing for a football (soccer everywhere else but here) team. It had a very fat greek wedding type feel, but I actually enjoyed it even more. Course I was probably partially biased because both lead actresses were cute. Then again, it was probably because they were playing soccer part of the time. Dude, soccer chicks rule. Like, really rule. Huge brownie points. But yeah, either due to biases or the actual entertainment value of the movie, a whopping 5 M's to this one, I recommend it.

Ack was gonna write more but I'm leaving early for Snow Summit. More later.

Arg.

Could someone tell the people over at the GOLD system to post my Econ 101 grade please? It is the only one not posted, and is of course the most important one. Gr.

Word on the street is I'm going snowboarding again on Friday. Schweet. Wanna come? Lemme know.

Carvature. Carvation. Carvin up a Storm. Carvilicious.

I was trying to come up with more fun exclamations along with the above all day yesterday. For some reason, my second day snowboarding took me from making slow progress learning to stay upright toe edge on the bunny hill, to making gigantic progress on my first run down the steep stuff, to carving massive ruts in lengthy s's throughout the remainder of the day. It's actually kind of strange, I think the gentler slopes were actually making it more difficult to learn to be more effective at carving turns. Although the steeper stuff is more visually intimidating, especially since once you turn your board downhill you're going to start moving in a hurry as you try to make the turn, it actually made it easier to learn.

Don't get me wrong, I had some particularly ugly falls, along with my fair share of skid outs. Man did I have a good time though. Being able to go screaming down the hill yet be confident enough that you can carve a toe edge turn just before running into the tree/small child/fallen snowboarder/cliff/mud patch/obstacle in front of you is quite a rush. The people I went with were of varying skill levels, but we were all able to get up and down the mountain a bunch of times. Lift exits were as usual somewhat challenging, but on the whole we avoided taking each other out more often than not. Top eat on the day went to my good friend whose talent on skis is unfortunatley less than his talent in real estate. The express lifts are a bit challenging at first, and he managed to get laid out horizontal right underneath it. Overall though he improved dramatically during only his second day on skis. Unfortunately I managed to save my worst eats for the last run of the day, having almost avoided doing anything really painful until then. One involved me trying to travel too fast in a straight line (for some reason much more difficult than me than carving s's) and somehow flipping through the air landing flat on my back. My friend got a great view of this one and chimed in with a nice "ooooooooh that looked like it hurt" immediately following. The second is a classic example of why turning around to look behind you for your friends while hauling ass is not the best idea. I had slowed down a bit and was just plowing down heel edge with my board perpindicular to the slope when I made the mistake. Somehow I leaned too far forward digging in the front edge, and as most snowboarders know that meant an immediate and abrupt faceplant. This one my friends missed out on, but a few of the cute girls in the area asked me if I was okay. Nothing like a faceplant to boost your pride.

The road home was long, as we had to take a side trip to Temecula to switch cars and drop off one of the friends we'd picked up on the way up from where we'd spent the night in San Diego. I did catch part of a hot air balloon convention of whatnot in that area though, had been a long time since I'd seen those in person. A ride in one is of course on my life list of things to do.

I'm now very comfortable with most any kind of slope, although carving down the double diamond stuff is probably still out of the question, most anything else is great fun. Too bad it costs so much. :/ Note to self, even though wearing sunglasses gives you a really weird tan line everyone makes fun of, it's much better than the alternative which I tried yesterday. All evening and even this morning my eyes were more red than white, and although I don't have strange tan lines (albeit I am burned in a few areas of my face) the headaches were definitely not worth it. I will be Joe Cool in his shades on the slopes from now on.

I Know, I'm Lame.

Went snowboarding today. Am dead. Good stories though. Unfortunately due to an oversight by myself, my ocular cavities are a wonderful shade of blood red. Going to sleep, will fill everything in later.

Done. Ten weeks to Go. So Not Really.

Finished up my last final this morning, probably was the best of the bunch.

Packing up and heading out, will update later with the ever popular grade predictions, once I'm back in the realm of the smog. See all you college peeps in a week.

That Coulda Been Bad...

So I study my butt off yesterday for the two finals that were scheduled for today, and end up eventually crashing in the wee hours of the morning as my friend and I decide our brains are as mushy as they'll get. Well that was mostly me deciding that, but I was tired. The alarm went off at 6:30 so we could move our cars, which was very cold and very annoying. Yeah I could have moved them the night before, but then I wouldn't have been forced to wake up. So I come back and roll around for a while whining about having to go take a final, and finally get my act together shower and head toward Phelps. I get there at like 7:45 and there are two people in the room, I figure well it's an 8 it's probably just ppl running late. At 8 there are now four of us in the room. I figure damn, looks like they rescheduled it to 9 like they sometimes do with 8am finals that won't last the full three hours. So I go down and buy some trail mix and a Powerade to occupy the time, and scan through various chapters of the book for any last minute useful information that might be helpful for the two essays. So about 8:50 rolls around and the place is really filling up. I get my blue book all ready for the essays and some random woman I've never seen before comes in with a stack of tests. I figure well, this class has no section, maybe it's the T/A, or the grader or someone. Then she's like, "I hope you all brought your scantrons... " This of course was a shock because I was expecting two essays. The thought occurs to me that this might not be my class. I go outside and ask someone what class is taking a final in that room and sure enough, it's Sociology 4, not Economics 113A. I hurriedly gather my things and leave, getting looks of bewilderment from the other students in there. I now have a real problem, potentially my final started almost an hour previously, somewhere else. I decide to go over to the Undergrad office to see if they have a list of where the finals are supposed to be, sweating bullets the whole way. They look it up, and find out it's scheduled for Friday at 8am. What the. Friday? I check my notes, and in three different places I have it written as Wednesday. So we check the schedule of classes booklet thing with the Final schedule in it as well, and it says classes that are MWF at 8 have finals on Friday at 8. So two sources now say I'm an idiot. I then notice in her list of classes that the second class that the professor is teaching this quarter had its final today at 8am. So he probably mixed them up on the initial syllabus and when initially giving us the info. Sigh.

I then came home and slept for like four more hours. After a bunch more studying I'm pretty comfortable about the one tonight at 7:30. I'll have plenty of time to tune in to CNN in another hour or so to find out what kind of world events take place. So here I am, still with 3 Finals to go, as most people pack up and go home. Doh.

It's been a while since I posted lyrics that meant something, so here you go.

"Listen late last night I heard the screen doors sway
and a big yellow taxi took my girl away...
Now don't it always seem to go
that you don't know what you got til it's gone
they paved paradise, and put up a parking lot."

It's the bridge and chorus of a new catchy Counting Crows song featuring Vanessa Carlton called Big Yellow Taxi. Good stuff.

Running Circles Around the Airtrains...

Out did even my wildest expectations today by managing to circumnavigate the airport with merely a pair of running shoes. Unfortuantely Monday slow distance day came on a day where the winds were at 20mph with gusts to 30. Luckily the middle legs of the run were all downwind, which is the time you need a boost the most. Initially though it really felt like I was going nowhere in a hurry, and the last mile or so probably looked pretty pathetic to passers by. Other than a breather and streching session at Hollister and Fairview about halfway through, I managed to do the whole thing without stopping, at least 5.5 miles in 52 min or so. Again not exactly hauling, but I was merely trying to survive the run and make it all the way around without having to stop and call a cab. The best part is I had no leg pain whatsoever during the run. Although in the last couple miles my whole body felt tired, it wasn't any kind of sharp pain or anything, and my lungs didn't feel like they were overworked, I just was fully tired.

I think I'm going to experiment tomorrow with a little couple mile island loop run or something, to see how my body feels about going to 5 days a week. I've been getting in gradually increasing distance three days a week now for over a month, and with a little over three months to go potentially, it's probably time to start getting even more serious about it.

It would appear the UN is pulling out all the inspectors, and Bush is set to address the nation at 5pm today. Gee, wonder what he's going to say.

Most Boring Ever

I'd love to say life is at least a little interesting at the moment but it really isn't. Finals at 8am and 7:30pm on Wednesday, and the last one at 4pm on Thursday. If I'm not doing anything when I'm studying, if I'm studying then nothing is going on.

Word on the street is tomorrow the doodoo hits the fan as they say in Iraq. Something tells me finals will still proceed as scheduled.

All Too Familiar...

Last night I was entertained by MTV's True Life: I'm a Gamer which was altogether way too strangely familiar. I'm glad to say never in my life have I reached the mental state of a couple of the guys they featured, one of whom was addicted to and the world champion of Pac Man (hello this isn't 1985 anymore) and the other who would spend hundreds of dollars gambling on Golden Tee. Least the games I tend to seriously play don't cost money by the game, and I tend to stay up with the times. So yeah the most interesting segment was the one where they followed around the world CPL champion now three years running, Fatal1ty. The fact that I've actually played against him (and gotten my ass handed to me) is just kind of a neat thing. One of my female friends was watching it as well, and I'm sure was definitely finding trouble understanding how people can get so worked up over a game. During the segment Fatal1ty is playing at the world championships in Texas in the UT2K3 tournament finals, and after winning leaps up with a big OH YAH BABY THATS WHAT IM TALKIN ABOUT and pumps his fist as the forty or so cameras flock in and surround him. He ended up pocketing a cool 10 g's off that tournament, and was quoted as saying he makes somewhere around 100k a year through tournaments and sponsorships. That's right, sponsorships. Pretty amazing eh? Being paid to just play games ten hours a day every day, and be the best. Only problem is when you're the best everyone is gunning for you, and probably a hundred thousand people think they can own you if they ever got the chance. Losing to some random twelve year old must really suck.

I saw in someone else's blog that they used the world "ergle" in a time of frustration. I think that will now become my word of the week. This day hasn't gone too well, with me oversleeping, then forgetting I had a movie due back at Blockbuster at noon until 11:45, then dropping my ice cream all over my desk after lunch while trying to put down my apple. Oh then there was the parking ticket I got because I was supposed to go out later last night with some friends, and they flaked, and I forgot I'd left my car in the meter spot because I thought I was going out again before this morning. First ticket since 2/9/02 according to my checkbook. Man I had a streak going. The good news is you can pay them online now, but only 24 hours after the ticket was given. Least it's less of a pain than wasting a stamp and having to troop all the way to a mailbox.

Guess the party's over and it's back to studying. Today, tomorrow, the next day, the next day, and the next day will all be pretty hardcore devoted to it. Lovely.

Finals Begin...

In about three hours with my first and probably easiest, Geography 150. Nonetheless I've been in the books all day and going over the study guide making sure it's as easy as it should be. Managed to get off my ass this morning and go hit the track after class... Was originally going to do a 3 mile pretty decent pace run, but upon arriving was in the mood to just haul ass, so I decided to run a timed mile for the first time since August. The mile is really at a different level than any higher distance. Normally you have a quick opening couple laps, a bunch of mediocre middle ones, and a couple quick finishing laps in a race such as the 2 mile. Unfortunately the mile isn't that long. You basically sprint the first lap, try to maintain the same speed through the second, when you feel like dying on the third continue to fit in surges whenever possible, and then even though your legs are falling off make sure to try to make your last lap the fastest of the four. Easier said than done. Had been quite a while since I ran at that pace for any extended period of time. Managed a ninety second opening lap which is pretty ridiculous, then managed to hit the stop button instead of the lap button on my watch and thus had to skip a lap's time, then finished with a pair of 1:45 laps. Judging by what it felt like, the second lap was at least as fast as the third, so I gave myself a 6:45 overall time.

For those who have been following my forays back into running, you'll notice that's way below ordinary. The last timed mile I ran at the same UCSB track was an 8:26, giving a 101 second improvement. Pretty much unheard of. Then again I wasn't in the best of shape at that point, and later in the summer as the first half of a 2mile I notched an 8:02. Still never under 8, until last week's first half of a 2mile was 7:37. But a full minute off of that is pretty impressive. I'm actually improving at a speed faster than I expected. Since one mile wasn't a very good workout after a few minutes rest I tagged on an 800 which I completed in 3:10, although I didn't input the full on sprint second lap that I usually do, and was treating it more as a workout than a race. Again though, still faster than previous. One of these workouts I'll probably make a set of 800s, with the first one being treated racelike to see how far under 3:00 I can take it. With this race much like the mile though, high school is a whole nother stratosphere, with my personal bests being 2:15 in the 800 and 5:05 in the mile. My lap averages in the two races at the moment are about 95 seconds and 102 seconds, whereas in high school I was at 68 seconds and 76 seconds. Chipping away here and there is easy, but 25 seconds a lap is like, an entire straightaway and part of a turn at high school speeds.

These last few days I've really been feeling optimistic about my gains though, and through prolonged stretching before during and after I've avoided all leg pain outside the occasional general soreness after running my ass off, and even that disappears shortly afterwards. Running on the UCSB track in Air Max's is like running on foam, I always look forward to getting there, strange as it may be. The itch to get to five days a week is growing stronger, but I'm going to hold off until at least Spring Break, maybe adding a fourth day next week as a test. I will see a lot better gains in workouts when I'm able to intermix speed work with distance runs on an every other day basis, still taking the weekends off.

It would be so sweet if I had some sort of holographic image of my high school self running with me on the track at the same speed I ran my PR's at. Not that I'd be able to come anywhere near competing at this point, but trying to avoid being lapped would be fun, and it would be a great way to gauage where I was at when it comes to improvement.

A First!

Ladies and gentlemen, for the first time ever we have a guest speaker to the blog!

I have no editorial control over what follows:

Hi. Matt has some interesting songs on his winamp playlist. Many come with interesting dances. Perhaps he'll dance for you if you come visit him; i suggest requesting Sisqo's "Thong Song" . . . :)

Hm. Note to self refrain from using guest speakers in the future. Not my fault the guest took so long I was having to entertain myself using other methods. What's wrong with interesting dances anyway! Hmph.

Hung out with the same person for obscene amounts of time today. Was very strange. Way more than average. Cannot explain. I think they put something in the water.

Ran all the way down to the end of the pier today. Lot further than it used to be since I'm way over on this side of campus now and have to run across the island to get to where I used to start from in years past. Definitely the longest run time wise since I've started, going to have Mondays be long slow distance days. Hopefully within a few weeks will make it over towards the airport, and maybe in a few months run all the way around the airport. Should be fun. The two day weekend was good for my legs I think, I hadn't had a two day break in a few weeks.

Today I started actually studying. Actually reading even. Made up a schedule breaking it down over the next ten days, what I'm reading when, when I'm reviewing, etc etc. Even working on the weekends. It's gettin all crazy up in this.

The Endlessness of Space...

For all those looking for a new game out there that is quite good, but won't end up consuming your life, I recommend Freelancer. It was the "immersive" one I was afraid of, but as it turned out the single player portion really isn't as long as it seems like it will be. There are "levels" when it comes to experience so to speak, but the max is only 38, and you only end up getting to around 16 by the end of the plot. All in all it took about eighteen hours to beat, which for a lot of people doesn't even constitute a full weekend. I'll keep my mouth shut on that one. It had been a long time since I played a space sim, or any kind of game that let's you move freely through thrree dimensional space. I remember back in the day I played the Descent series, and those games were great fun because you had that extra axis to work with. Rather than walking down a hallway, you could choose to barrel roll, do some loops, zip through it inverted backwards, or whatever is most helpful in the situation. Only bad thing about the game is you eventually max out your ship and weapons, finish the single player plot, and everything else becomes kind of boring. Unless you really get into it and love to explore the endless realm of space and every base or trade route within it, there's not a whole lot to do. The single player missions however are pretty challenging at times, and the plot is involving enough to make it seem like there's a point. The female lead is pretty cute too. ;) You know programmers and creating female likenesses in computer games.

The bad news is I'm basically done with it already. The good news is with finals starting on Wednesday and then three more the following week, that's probably for the better.

Interesting documentary on MTV tomorrow night at 10 by a journalist who visited Kuwait and our troops. He did a similar thing as a part of the "For The Troops" special which I thought was really good that aired last year and was largely about the War on Terror in Afghanistan. Should be worth watching for sure.

Immortality.

Quite an interesting topic actually. There's actually a whole lot I could say about it. Unfortunately I'm tired. Tonight's movie is what brought up the subject, as some friends and I took in Tuck Everlasting. Of the short and sweet variety, this one had typical live action Disney fare. Basic concept is boy meets girl, boy is immortal, girl isn't, girl has to decide whether to become immortal with him as well, climax at the end where you find out what happens. A whole lot of sappy lovey dovey goodness in the middle. I actually enjoyed the female lead's performance, and I suppose the male lead did a decent job of being your typical hearthrob. We'll go with 4 M's. It was a mere 88 minutes, so it's one you can just sort of breeze through when you have an hour to kill. Cute, helps to remind those of us who are no longer teenagers what it was like to be one once.

Tuned in to the President's speech tonight, primetime live usually means big news, as it turned out it sounded much like repetition of stuff he's already said. I was expecting more, something along the lines of let's go get em. The wait goes on. Saw an interesting 60 Minutes a few nights ago where they went around Kuwait interviewing a bunch of the soldiers, and they all talked about how bored they were with training, and were basically hoping to either get the hell in and do their job, or get the hell out and go home. The natives are getting restless as they say. I guess it's only a matter of time.

Some of the people I hung out with tonight who I hadn't seen in a few months said I looked much thinner. The best part is when people who don't even know you're trying say that. They're the ones you know are actually being honest. It's not like I was ever fat, or think I am now, but being healthier and more in shape is just a very neat feeling, and it'll only get better.

Vroom.

Man, woke up at 6:15 as usual for a Monday Wednesday or Friday and was still feeling the effects of the cold from the last couple days, it's been sort of a mini version of one that's been going around, but annoying nonetheless. Given the 39 degree outside temperature, decided to go ahead and sleep in and try my luck later on with regards to being able to get a run in and not die of hypothermia. Was a much more livable 60 around 11 when I finally got off my butt, so I went ahead and headed over to the track. It's much more comfortable running on the all weather track than on pavement, and I think it's doing wonders for preventing shin splints. Unfortunately the ROTC group prevents me from doing it in the early morning, so going to have to find a way around that next quarter. Maybe get up even earlier, maybe switch things around in the morning so that I go to class first. Just annoying to have to take 2 or 3 showers a day, that's why taking off to workout right when you wakeup works best.

Anyway, so I decided to go ahead and do another 2 mile time trial like the one I did last Saturday, in which I posted a pretty good time almost identical pacing wise to my fastest 2 mile of the last several years which I ran last July before shin splints put me under. It was still a bit slower though, but I knew with a few more training days it wouldn't be too difficult to surpass it. What I DIDN'T expect, was to haul ass as fast as I did this morning. My opening mile was a blazing (for me anyway) 7:37, which is the fastest mile I've run in quite some time, even though I wasn't even going full speed due to the expectations of having to run another without stopping. At the 1.5 mile mark I was at 11:51. This is also awesome because the requirements for OTS in the 1.5 mile event is 12:00, and that's the first time I've run under it. Yet again though, I could have gone faster if I didn't know I had another half mile to go. During laps 6 and 7 I was really feeling the effects of going out so fast, and my lap times started increasing, but my slow lap on the day was still only a 2:09, compared with a 2:20 or even 2:25 from previous trials. I then managed to turn in the fastest finishing lap I've run since I started training about a year ago. All this put together put me at a 2 mile time of 15:49. Nothing incredibly amazing given my times in the 11's and 12's in High School, but very impressive when comparing with more recent times. I cut over a minute off my PR when not including High School, which most runners know is a gigantic difference. Especially in a four day period. As I was running and turned in that incredible opening mile my goal became to break 16:00, when at the start of the run it was to break 16:30, even with the quicker goal I still made it easily.

For almost three weeks of more serious training, I've managed huge gains in speed. My initial 2 mile time was 18:34, although I definitely wasn't trying for any kind of speed in order to avoid injury. Two days later, 18:10, then two more, 17:54. Couple runs last week outside the track on the beach and so forth more for distance and longevity rather than speed, then Saturday a 16:55, followed with another distance run on Monday, then today's 15:49. It's going to become much more difficult to quicken my times however. Going to be focusing more on the in between runs, going a bit further on the distance runs, trying to get my legs further into the "used to running" shape they need to be in. One goal is to eventually get to training 5 days a week instead of 3, which will really help and allow me to work in some speed workouts along with the distance training. To put that much strain on my legs is going to require at least another month or two of what I've been doing though, until I don't feel the slightest hint of soreness anywhere near my shins or any other part of my lower leg associated with constant pounding. I don't feel ready yet, but I've got plenty of time.

I remember typing in this last summer that my intermediate goal was of course to break what was the requirement at that time when they were still running the 2 mile at OTS, which was 16:30, with my primary goal being to get to 15 minutes. I thought I was a loooooong way off from that. I probably still am, cutting another minute off will be much harder the second time around, especially after how dead I felt after today's. The most optimistic aspect of the whole process is these are times I'm running while alone on the track, never having anyone of the same pace to drag me along, so to speak. When being chased down or passed by hundreds of fellow trainees, with instructors yelling "encouragement" from the side of the track, something tells me the motivation to run even faster will be quite apparent.

Yeah, I thnk that's enough babbling about running today. Looking forward to Friday's weigh in, might see something in the 180s after two weeks ago I was at 190 flat. I've hovered right around there for a while, think it's about time I get into the 180s for good. I forget the conversion, it's something like you should run a mile 5 seconds faster for every pound you lose? Or something like that.

Left Right Left Right A B A B Select Start.

Probably made a mistake a couple days ago when I discoverd a cache of ROMs as they're called, for the prehistoric NES. Also known as the Nintendo Entertainment System, it was quite the amazing toy for my generation. Back then it wasn't quite an addiction, but man were there a lot of hours of fun involved. So yeah, an emulator that can be easily downloaded for a PC can "emulate" a Nintendo system, such that if you download a .nes file, you're able to play the game. In my case, the guy had over 600 games, most of which I've never heard of. But man, when I hear the Super Mario Bros 3 theme, or load up some of the other oldies but goodies, I get taken wayyyyyyyy back.

Luckily the simpleness of the system allowed most games to be beaten in a matter of hours, rather than the days, weeks, or even MONTHS that today's games require. One of the words that always scares me when downloading a game is "immersive," because that usually means it either goes on forever, you can get lost in it forever, or you never want to stop playing. Luckily, I'm not the type to enjoy that kind of game. I usually get bored of a new game, some faster than others. Very rare is the game with the staying power than has me playing it on and off for more than a month.

And yes, I'm still getting real life stuff done too. Last midterm finally on Tuesday, with finals coming in a few weeks. Will definitely be holing myself up at some point, since this set of grades and the next set in June are all there are left to affect my graduating GPA. Did all the reserving and whatnot for Commencement, looks like it'll be 4pm on Saturday the 15th, with all the other hundreds of Econ and Bus Econ majors.

From Downtown...

Intramurals was even more fun than usual last night, as it consisted of the Battle of the Bigs, i.e. the so far winless teams both at 0-5. :) Maybe it was the more competitive skill levels, but my team really had our act together last night. From the opening jump ball that I managed to bring down to our first lead of the season at 1-0, everyone was working hard. Going into halftime we were down by 3 (guys shots count 1 and 2 for a three pointer and girls count 2 out 3) but we had much more confidence than usual. I buried my first three pointer (2 in this case) of the season to tie it up a few minutes into the second half, and did my part in snaggin a few power rebounds and steals along the way. I managed 8 points, which is almost double my total from the entire previous 5 games. As a team our best score had been 17, but this time we managed 29 for a large victory margin going away. Quite fun stuff.

Later that night we headed over to the UCen where a sorority was holding casino night, which was also great entertainment. The only bad part of it was me twitching every time the dealer dealt or tried to shuffle, as they had a lot of people filling in who had never played the game before and had just learned the rules, so it went awwwwwwfuly slowly. I finally persuaded them to let me shuffle when it was necessary, and although I would have had even more fun dealing, I managed to refrain. Although the chips were fake, I ended up with ten times what I started with, figures that the one time the money isn't real I'd rake it in. Below average night at Chumash on Monday unfortunately, although the potential was huge, with two of us making it to the semifinals of the tournament. For some strange reason they decided to seat the semis randomly instead of based on time, so my friend and I both ended up on the same table, something that is usually prevented. Also annoying was the strangely large amount of ties that took place in the first rounds, so our table ended up with 6 instead of the usual 5, with 2 going on to the finals. As it ended up a dealer blackjack on the last hand killed both me and my friend, and we took 3rd and 4th respectively, with no one moving on to the finals to pocket the big cash. Given you win $50 just for winning your initial table though, that brings my tournament winnings up to about $400. Given I've spent $25 to enter combined, I'd say that's a pretty good ratio.

Felt more tired than usual running this morning, probably because I felt pretty dead after the game last night and hadn't had a meal anywhere in between. The long weeked put me on a Tue/Thur/Sat set this week, but will be able to go right into the normal Mon/Wed/Fri situation starting next week. Two day gaps are annoying anyway. Why'd someone have to go and make the week an odd number of days way back when?

Ack Okay Here We Go Again...

Strange shenanigans with my blog lately, having to retype this post, gr.

So my original plan was to go visit someone in LA on Friday, and the plan was to call her when I was leaving. So I called Friday morning after packing, and she told me something had came up. So I sat around for a few hours moping. Then another friend called and said he was going to San Diego a day later than he had originally planned, which of course I'd had to miss out on since I was supposedly going to LA instead. This ended up fitting in perfectly, and so within an hour or so I was headed off down the 101. I actually ended up stopping by the friend's place since it was only a couple min out of the way, and leaving a funny note on her door. That of course earned me a page later asking me what the heck I was doing in LA and was I still there. Alas I was most of the way to SD at that point, much to her chagrin. I spent the night at my friend's mother's house, which had this really sweet view on all sides from up on a hill looking toward the ocean. After a wonderfully peaceful sleep we were up pretty early and headed out to breakfast at this family restaurant nearby.

Our plan was then to head over to Sea World for the day with his girlfriend, the same group of three I went with a few years ago. Unfortunately the weather was not ideal, as it stayed in the 60s and even colder much of the day. That didn't stop us from sitting in the "soak zone" whenever possible though. One of the highlights of the day was going on the Shipwreck Rapids ride four times in a row, which is one of those rides where the vehicle is shaped like a large innertube with seats all facing inwards, as you float along through rapids and under waterfalls and the like, with the object to not be the one getting waves over your head drenching you thoroughly. I always have such a blast on these types, especially when it's the people across from me getting the worst of it. This one had a waterfall at the end though that stretched across the whole path, so there was no escaping it other than the fact that some parts were heavier than others. Unfortunately the worst wave was the one right before the end, so you could stay totally dry to that point and end up with half your clothing sticking to you. After each ride I would find a dry spot on my body that made it "unacceptable" and chants of "ONE MORE RIDE, ONE MORE RIDE" would ensue. After four though, we'd all gotten hammered thoroughly and decided to call it quits. For the remainder of the day my jeans never dried, and my shirt ended up getting stretched out quite a bit due to the weight of the water.

We also had a bunch of fun trying some of the carnival games, and I won a mini Shamu at one of them where you have to roll golf balls up into a bunch of holes of different increments to propel your racer across the track. There was also a DDR machine there, and my friend and I ended up drawing a bit of a crowd of onlookers. We're not insane or anything, we don't have any of them memorized and can't do it blindfolded, but we're alright. Was very good for warming up, and helping dry off a bit.

As usual the night Shamu show was my favorite, as they rocked the house. The preshow consists of current popular songs blasting through the stadium, as the big Jumbotron video screen switches back and forth between a couple video cameras they have posted around the stadium, which zoom in on unsuspecting audience members at inopportune times. I of course try my best to look as dorky as possible and always manage to appear at least once. My friends were pansies and sat up in the safe section this time around, but I was in my usual soak zone aisle seat, and with the much smaller crowd choosing to brave the waves I managed to get on the big screen three different times, although they claim it was only two. Nothing like being on the big screen. :)

Afterwards the original plan was to go out to dinner with her family, but I ended up getting in touch with another friend and she came and picked me up instead. I hadn't seen her for quite a long time, and she'd made a drastic change to her hair, so that was pretty interesting. I'm hoping to hook up with a lot of the people I haven't seen in forever before this summer, as things will probably get pretty crazy pretty quick.

Later on that night I was introduced to Viejas, one of the many indian casinos down there. I must say that based on that night, Chumash must be really robbing people blind on the machines. I only played a couple machines I didn't cash out on, with some of them cashing huge amounts. We played a lot on the tables as well, and even though I had a below average night at blackjack the machines made up for it and then some, which is usually the opposite of what goes on. I also played a bunch of Caribbean Stud, a game I had never played prior, which is very fun. It can get expensive, but you can win in a hurry as well, and on any given hand you could win the progressive jackpot, which was at over $81,000 while we were there. Pretty crazy stuff, even higher possibilities than Let it Ride.

Unfortunately we had to leave quite early the next morning, so the watch alarm went off much earlier than expected. On the way back I made a second stop in LA, having arranged a lunch meeting with the aforementioned friend who'd kinda ditched me the day before and I'd sorta ditched in return. That was fun, as although she has intentions to come up in a couple weekends, she had never met any of my friends from Santa Barbara. Eventually we got on the road again, and made it back to Santa Barbara late Monday, shortly before the rain.

There, the weekend in a nutshell.

Er, Busted Again?

My last post doesn't seem to be showing up. What the dilly yo.

Yah I Know, Geez.

So I ended up actually taking off for a couple days this weekend, and just got back a little while ago. Was quite the successful venture, will tell ya all about it probably later on tonight or tomorrow morning if I end up just crashing.

Big rain coming I hear, and THUNDER even. Should be fun.

Hm, Site Busted?

Can't seem to access my site through the web, but I can still post to it through Blogger. Strange.

Yeah not much happening around here, been actually studying some, working out some more, sticking to everything as I should be.

Sore All Over...

Found a new training regiment online, and began it yesterday. It's actually based off of what Navy SEALs do to prepare for their training. It's eighteen weeks long, but the last nine become pretty ridiculously difficult, so I'll probably just use the first nine. Basically each week adds on more sets or reps of pushups and situps, along with eventually adding more distance to the running and length of time to the swimming. By the end of nine weeks I should have no problem whatsoever with the minimums for the pushups and situps, and might even be able to get closer to maxing those categories. Maxing the 1.5 mile requires something like a 7:30, and I wasn't even able to run that in high school, so I'm definitely not expecting that. Ten minutes flat would be a nice long term goal, although the requirement is only twelve.

Monday night at Chumash brought home happy faces yet again... To make a long story short regarding my participation in the tournament, I was basically as sure a thing as you can get, having 20 against a dealer 10 and being all in, with the only other competitive person having over half her chips in with 15. Had she hit and busted, I would have won. Had she stayed and the dealer beat her (he had 17) I would have won. Had she hit and the dealer still beat her, I would have won. As it turned out, she doubled down on 15. Basically her only chance, and it required a miracle. She got a 6, and won the table, sending me packing. All was not lost however, my friend who had never made it to the final table before finally did, and took a respectable 3rd, pocketing $300. His girlfriend also did well on the night, getting a nice four of a kind on a machine, and then later they both got flushes at Let It Ride. I was up and down a bit overall, occasionally going on winning streaks, but nothing to write home about. Eventually I left up a whopping $10, with the other two up a combined $390. The fourth in our party was the lone downer, but even that number wasn't significant. So great fun in the car on the way home was had by all, as well as a simply hilarious dinner conversation involving a lot of straw wrapper launching at each other. Always nice to be back in 5th grade again. :)

They seem to have mumblings about road tripping for Spring Break and needed a location, I mentioned Yellowstone and they seemed jazzed, we'll have to see how that ends up working out.

Now I must go study for the midterm I have in a few hours. Yes of course there is a method to my madness.

AYYYYYYYYAHHHHHHHHHH!

Okay that isn't anywhere close, but I was trying to get a sound that was at least as loud as the Tarzan yell. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhayayahhhhhhhhhhh is probably closer but that looks like laughter. Anyway you get the idea. Went on a very awesome hike today up on the Red Rock trail off of Paradise Road on the other side of the mountains, and had loads of fun. Unfortunately I wasn't exactly informed as to what type of trail it was, so I went in my usual jeans and comfortable air max's. Turns out that balance was the name of the game, as at least 1/3 of the trail involved scrambling or bouncing between rocks. This was largely because you ended up crossing the river the trail ran along countless times along the way. The trail eventually leads to various swimming holes, and this especially cool rope swing thing thtat zips you way out over an especially deep one. Had I been wearing a bathing suit I would have been in heaven. As it was, due to the recent rainfall, one of the river crossings ended up much deeper than it looked. Like, much deeper, with no alternate route to be found after searching around nearby. So initially rolling the jeans up to the thigh is working out along with carrying both my shoes and socks, then both large rocks I'm standing on about halfway across give way, and given I'm barefoot and all the other rocks are as slippery as they come, after a gallant stumbling and balancing act I manage to stay mostly upright, and immediately learn that Nike's float when you drop them in rivers. After one more slightly less traumatic skidding session I make it to the other side, with my jeans soaked from the thigh down, and a big toe bleeding slightly. Man was it fun though.

For future reference, after rainfall, this could be an even more fun hike. I recommend a bathing suit first of all. Second of all I recommend socks and shoes for the majority of the hike, but also sandals for the treks through the water, goes much easier through the sharp stuff. A backpack obviously helps for carrying everyone's extra equipment. Also don't forget your camera, as we got some really nice shots of each of us slinging ourselves out over the lake on the rope swing and posing as if we were about to fly off. There were some close shaves, but nothing to write home about. The whole excursion reminded me of a trip my family and I made to Dinkey Creek, which was so long ago I don't even have any recollection of where it is. The water up here though was actually a decent temperature though. Not exactly Reccen heated pool, but far from freezing ocean as well. I'm sure I'll be making a return trek at some point.

We also have a movie review tonight, as I managed to get in two social events in a single day, amazing as it sounds. The Recruit walks away with 4.5 M's. This was actually a very entertaining movie, but it gets kept out of the 5 star range due to predictability. There were some twists, but the entire ending is somewhat obvious as it progresses. Huge bonus points though for making me laugh out loud at various random occasions, including the line "metaphysically wrinkle-free." You really had to be there. Huge negative tick marks however counterbalance the previous, due to a chase scene that involved a VW Bug and a pickup truck. I mean, cmon. Not exactly Bond, James Bond. Didn't check the indiglo once though, probably because this fell into the less than two hour category rather than the ever increasingly popular over two and a half hour category. Not a diehard Pacino fan, prefer De Niro myself, but Farrell performed well. Oh, and the female lead wasn't blond. All in all some pros and some cons, and I've heard mixed reviews from other people. I really don't think I could ever take a job where you can't trust anyone. I think I could easily handle working with classified information and not being able to tell anyone, but not being able to trust the people you work with, or even loved ones, because they might be bad guys, is just kind of hard to fathom. Although now that I think about it, if anyone is working for the KGB, it's my brother. He's got that "pretend to be stupid" thing down pat.

Wow longest movie review in a while. Must be in a talking mood.

Merry Being Single Awareness Day....

Another big V-Day, another lonely night. It's actually not causing the usual case of felling sorry for myself this year, only because I'm aware that if I did have someone special currently, I'd soon be saying good bye to them for quite a lengthy period of time. Some would argue it's better to have the goods and deal with the bads, but for now I'm satisfied with hanging out in mediocrity.

Ran for quite a decent amount of time today, and then amazed even myself by actually going out and getting a watch. My previous one had slowly been disentegrating over the past weeks, so I went out and snagged a similar version but a newer model. Quite spiff, trimmed in navy blue, will match my uniform quite well. ;) Hm, just noticed it's trying to tell me it's Sunday, forgot to set the day. Whatadork.

So, a three day weekend and nowhere to go. Anyone want a random visitor? Just toss up an invite! Hm then again I might just show up somewhere. I've been known to do such things.

A Couple Days Later, Reflection.

So a few days have passed, and the pure euphoric feeling has lessened at least enough that I can start blogging again. It has been a pretty amazing couple of days. After getting off the phone with the computer and writing that first blog, I immediately called all my immediate family members to let them know. I'm pretty sure they were glad I finally found out one way or another, as they were getting pretty bored of hearing me whine. As I'm sure everyone was. It's a feeling of relief like no other.

Throughout the last couple days I've been sharing the news with everyone who would listen, although most didn't actually know what OTS was, or how long I'd been making myself crazy over the wait. It's actually quite interesting, I keep hearing about people I know of my parent's generation who actually attempted to join the Air Force as a pilot or navigator or so forth, and were "shot down" due to medical problems, eyesight deficiencies, and various other disqualifying aspects. I consider myself very lucky that I've managed to fit the mold they're looking for, and am going to have the opportunity to have the job that a whole lot of people would die to do.

Many people have asked "so what happens now" so I'll briefly outline the future. Potential graduation (hey I don't take anything as a sure thing but it would require great negative effort on my part for this not to happen) is on June 15th. After I complete a bit more red tape, about a month or so down the road I should get a class letter stating when I go to OTS. By all predictions my class should be the one named 03-08, the last of the military fiscal year 03, which starts July 1. This means somewhere a couple days before that date I'll be packing up my new car (which will have been purchased shortly prior) and driving out to Montgomery, Alabama for the 10 weeks of OTS training. Gradutation from OTS is scheduled for September 19th, although there are some different activities involving the bar pinning ceremony and whatnot the day before. Upon successful graduation there is a lull between that and the start of my JSUNT class as they call it, which is Joint Specialized Undergraduate Navigator Training. If I get the track I'm shooting for, I'll be heading to train for Fighters in Pensacola, Florida. Pensacola is actually in the panhandle of Florida, so it's almost due South from Montgomery, not exactly Miami or anything, but I can live. After the different phases of training there, which take a little over a year total, I'll receive my wings and head off to wherever I'm ordered, my first actual AFB and missions and so forth. I saw on a sheet somewhere that the three bases that focus on F-15's are in North Carolina, Idaho, and Alaska. For all I know that sheet was way out of date though, but I can't say I'm really going to mind living anywhere. No matter where you go you'll be surrounded with people in similar situations to yourself, and obviously people living the same lifestyle, so making friends and meeting people shouldn't be too difficult.

So in a nutshell, that's the plan. Graduate at 22, graduate OTS later that year, receive my wings at 23, start serving my 8 year required period, reach the decision point at 31, either head out into the civilian world or as case may be, continue on in the military, potentially retiring after 20 years at age 43, and pocket half my salary for the rest of my life, possibly while even getting a second paycheck somewhere else. Or I could even stay in longer and pocket all the bonuses you get for agreeing to add years. Who knows. I don't pretend to know what I'm going to do in 20 years. :)

For now, I'll just stay focused on the goal. Had a good run this morning, it managed to basically stop raining completely for the period I was out. Had a quick breakfast and bolted off to class, which was of course upwind from my dorm, and with 30mph gusts that was pretty interesting. Got there just in time to see a bunch of people coming out, as someone had noticed a sign on the door saying class was cancelled today and Friday. Funny how he didn't know to tell us on Monday, yet was able to figure it out in time to post the sign so that we could see it after sloshing through the rain at 8am. No worries for me though, it's good to be up early regularly.

I should have much more to talk about from now on, now that I'm not sitting here staring at the clock and the phone intermittently.

The Wait Is Over.

The young man sits in his dorm room, multitasking as usual. Well not really multitasking, more like entertaining himself in multiple ways at the same time. The TV is on in the background, music videos and headline news occasionally filter through his head. Outside students shuffle past, late for midterms, late for class, late for breakfast. Winamp shuffles to the next song. The familiar guitar riff of the Top Gun Anthem plays. Meanwhile, the young man is engrossed in Soldier of Fortune 2, a game he's beaten before, and will beat again. Harder skill level this time, more challenging. Gunshots fill the air, machinegun fire alternates with the cries of enemies. It's a true cornucopia of sound eminating from his room.

Suddenly, the young man becomes aware of a different, much more important sound. The motions he goes through next are like clockwork. Take off headset. Mute speakers. Pick up remote. Mute television. Wait for second ring, make sure first wasn't a hallucination. Pick up phone. Is it the father, checking up on him again? Is it the mother, curious as to how he's holding up? Is it a friend, wanting to know if the news has come?

"Hello?"

"May I speak to Matt?"

"That's me."

"Is this Matthew Perry Wilson, Officer Trainee, future Second Lieutenant of the United States Air Force?"

"Yes. Yes it is."

The results are in, and so am I. You heard it here, first. Now to make some phone calls. :)