Monday, August 12, 2002

When It Rains...

So, my mother is currently recovering having undergone a hysterectomy this morning, apparently the procedure went as planned. She's expected to be in the hospital until Wednesday. Another really poor day at work. I was going to say shitty, but after a bad experience this weekend with someone lighting me up for swearing, and realizing that it's outlawed at OTS, I might as well cut it out of my vocabulary now. It's not like it's necessary, and it certainly doesn't help my image. I swear far below the average person, but I see no reason to do it at all Forgot to get lunch money, so I just went without. During the lunch hour my usual reading spot in the lobby of the Hyatt Regency next door was disrupted by jackhammers on the floor below. Traffic was worse than usual.

Then to top it off, I get a random e-mail then an IM from someone I'd planned on avoiding since coming to the realization in May that we were just different people. I'm stupid enough to reply, and later respond, and my reward is a conversation in which she proceeds to knock everything about my career choice, and myself in general. There were a few highlights, one of which was her informing me that she will happily be the person sending me off to war in some foreign country to die in order to protect her way of life while she spends her millions on material things. The one that really topped everything off though, was her informing me that in the "grand scheme of things," I'm just as much of a slut as she is. Now, I tend to censor this blog, in a way. I refrain from personal attacks, I never mention names, and I leave out much of the less flattering information I run into about people. In this case though, I'm not at all concerned with any reactions. As has probably been figured out, tonight's encounter was once again with the most recent ex. I've finally blocked her permanently, through all forms of communication that I have access to. I am no longer of the opinion that any sort of interaction would bring anything but negative results. In the years since our relationship ended (yes, years) she has taken up smoking, getting drunk on a regular basis, and sleeping with various people just to satisfy her physical need, including a neighbor, just because he was there. Those who know me, know why I unfortunately regret having ever been in a relationship with her. The three habits stated above are basically the least desirable traits a friend, or even a person, could possibly have. Granted, her side of the story will be different, if you ever have the displeasure of running into her and hearing about it. In my own defense, I can only say it has been over two years since I've received anything more than a hug from the opposite sex. Sad in a way, but true. I'm sure this helps you realize what a ridiculous statement the above quote really is, if you compare the two lifestyles. Why I even let it affect me, I have no idea. That's the last time. Alas, all I can say is my life will be much better off in the future, with her forgotten.

I can't thank my friends enough for being there over the last few years as I've moved through various stages of transition. I can only hope to follow your example and repay what you've given me, any way I can. The subject for that blog in May was "One Door Closes, Another Door Opens." Interestingly enough, it was still cracked enough for even more negativity to shine through. If there's a way to slam it harder than I just did, I'm not sure how.

Let it be known, this is the last blog in which she will be mentioned, permanently. Along those lines, if I give you the cold-shoulder in person when asked about the subject, back off.