Two Thirds Of One Fourth.

That's all I have left of my college career. I guess that works out to 1/6. Seems like still a decent amount to go, and I guess it is. Just had my last Final this morning, so Fall quarter is officially over. And now without any further ado, we have some TEST TAKING TIPS from Me.

1. The more you try to cram in just before the test, the more stuff that you knew before will fall out the back end.
2. Sit in the middle of the back row, no way they'll catch you cheating.
3. Wear shades to assist sneaky peripheral vision, and be prepared with a story about a rare eye condition that forces you to wear them.
4. Get there 20 minutes early, the ones already in the room with their pencils and scantrons nicely arranged are the ones you should be sitting behind.
5. When choosing someone to "acquire" answers from, don't judge a book by it's cover. I know some really intelligent looking idiots.
6. Be sure someone good looking is sitting at a major focal point, you need aesthetically pleasing atmosphere when you're staring off into space completely forgetting about the final for minutes at a time.
7. When in doubt, the answer is c, and if you doubt that, you're not in doubt.
8. Cough continuously, you'll annoy people and lower the curve. Sneezing works too, but harder to fake.
9. Hope for a creaky desk. If someone complains, blame the polarity of the earth.
AND LAST BUT CERTAINLY NOT LEAST
10. You know those clicker erasers that move up and down? And those clicking pens that pop in and out? Try to set a clicks per hour record.

There you have it. Foolproof guide to doing well on college finals. I'll bust out my grade predictions later on tonight, after I've already cheated by checking today's final against the answer key he's posting tonight.