Las Vegas, Day One.

The following is a description of the exploits of a certain twenty one year old individual during his hiatus from his university during which he made the trek to Las Vegas, Nevada for a period of three days in which he had one of the most enjoyable weekends of his life. Friday’s description follows, the next two installments will come later.

Disclaimer: There is the possibility that certain aspects of the trip will not be brought to light here, for reasons that will not be disclosed. For the most part, it's just to allow the reader to wonder about what aspects those might be, and why they will not be disclosed. I have no doubt that due to length the majority of the people who read this will be skimming for interesting portions, but I’m doing this more for myself so years down the road I can look back and read about how much fun I had. :)

Literally feels like two weeks ago that I was driving down Highway 1 last Thursday night on my way home for the trip, I vaguely remember singing very loudly to whatever was on the radio or the various tapes in my car from the 80s… (I have no cd player, and the last time cassette tapes were around was basically the 80s) That section of the trip was relatively uneventful, ended up going to bed early and getting up early, sailing over to the airport in basically no traffic and discovering the lines for security and whatnot were actually not as long as expected, and ending up with an hour or so to kill before boarding. The one hangup was when I discovered I’d forgotten to take my swiss army knife off my keychain, this poses a problem given the level of security and the fact that anything even resembling a sharp object cannot be carried on. I only had my one duffle, and although it wasn’t dinky I was carrying it on, so I figured if they caught me I’d just have it checked, no biggy. I was pretty sure they’d noticed the knife when they pulled my bag off the conveyor belt and held everything up while they sent it through again, and had my speech about “Oops I forgot” all ready, but eventually they said “You’re clear Sir” and waved me on. Go figure, you can’t take box cutters or portable drill sets on board planes, but a large bladed knife can be taken on by any Joe Schmoe. I was sure I had it made until I got to the gate and noticed that they now have a section set aside to random security checks as you hand them your ticket, the whole “Terrorist for a Day” process in which they go through every nook and cranny of your bag, checking cameras, pagers, and cell phones for function, and doing basically everything short of a strip search to try to find something bad. For some reason, although the people in front and behind me got “lucky” and were chosen for a search, I got waved right onto the plane. Works for me.

The flight over was also relatively uneventful, I had a window seat as usual and spent most of the time either staring out of it or flipping through the SkyMall magazine gasping at how expensive the most retarded items were… Anyone for a seven hundred dollar ear hair trimmer? :/ Upon disembarking I was welcomed by the sight of the first slot machines I’d ever seen in an airport, it makes sense though, what else are you supposed to do if your flight gets delayed. Popped in a buck, on the last hand got a four card straight flush dealt, didn’t come through though. :/ The shuttle trip to the Stratosphere where I was staying consisted mostly of me staring out the window at the huge hotels, signs, and everything that is the Strip in Vegas. Now I’m a city boy, spending most of my life in Los Angeles, so the thought of big buildings isn’t a strange one, but I felt like a kid in a candy store, a country boy who had never been to the big city before, clawing the window, eager to get out and enjoy the scenery. Eventually I made it over to the Stratosphere, which happened to be the last stop for the shuttle out of about ten hotels. I didn’t mind too much, got to learn my way around and see a lot of the places I’d be visiting and how to get to them, and the driver was friendly. That’s one thing that was very enjoyable about the trip, nothing but very friendly drivers when it came to taxis and so forth. I heard one horn honked the entire trip, and that was because some car with Virginia plates blatantly cut off the taxi I was in and almost caused an accident. Other than that, it was nothing like L.A. or NYC, everyone seemed cheerful, letting each other into and out of the right turn only lane, waving their thanks, and going on their way. Going to be using a lot of “anyways” due to the fact I foresee myself interrupting myself very often to tell side stories. It happens in real life too, it really sucks when I can’t remember what I was originally talking about.

ANYWAY.

So I arrive at the hotel and try to check in, only to find out the computer is down. Its about noon, and they tell me to try back in an hour or so, so I check my bags and ponder what to do with my time. Well I didn’t really ponder too long, given I was standing in the middle of a casino. I won’t go into detail about all my gambling experiences, basically had absolutely loads of fun, and ended up close to even on the trip, quite a feat given the fact that I was in Vegas for three days, and they’re notorious for robbing people blind. Played just about anything and everything at some point on the trip, the majority going into my favorite types of big money machines, and another large portion to tables, be it Blackjack or Let it Ride, along with some other random stuff here and there. I was keeping track on paper all the money that was going into machines and onto tables, and everything that was coming out, so I always knew where I stood, and what was paying and what wasn’t. The big winner machine wise was one called Razzle Dazzle, a really fun but rather expensive one that seemed to pay much more often than not. It’s a quarter slot and to make the big money you have to play all five lines, so at $1.25 a pop its not for your typical nickel player. It seems to pay at least your money back at least 50% of the time, and thus lasts a lot longer than your typical slot. However if you get the word Spin anywhere on the third reel, not JUST on the payline like the majority of your money yoinking slots, it spins a second wheel and pops out a number from ten to fifty, multiplying that by your bet (most likely five) and spitting out that many credits. There’s also a Razzle Dazzle symbol on that wheel, which if you manage to hit pays eight hundred times your bet, which for those math whizzes is four thousand credits, or a cool grand. I never hit it, but I got the 50x a few times, and ended up making almost two hundred bucks on that machine overall. So for those of you gambling phenoms out there, I recommend it.

It was actually quite strange, whenever I was going to be in the casino for a while and was trying to win so my money would last longer, I’d usually lose. Whenever I had like an 11:30pm dinner reservation and absolutely HAD to be at the taxis in like five minutes, and just randomly put a five or ten in a Razzle Dazzle machine on the way out, I win like seventy bucks and have to go cash it, then find another one and do it again, and end up almost late for whatever I was going to, although with much heavier pockets. The “Hurry Up And Win” strategy ended up making me more money than anything else, go figure. The one frustrating thing about Vegas when compared to the Indian casino here is that nothing is computerized and prints tickets, they all just pop out buckets and buckets of nickels or quarters you have to collect. Thus every time you win you have to go stand in the line to get bills again since you can’t carry more than one bucket without leaving one someplace accidentally or getting it jacked. It’s much easier to just collect tickets and bring them all at once to exchange for bills, without ever having to worry about dropping a random nickel and ending up with $19.95 or some lame total. Anyway rant over.

So eventually I get checked in, was a bit disappointed to be facing the downtown area of Vegas rather than the Strip, but I got over it since I was on the 23rd floor out of 25 or so, and thus could see quite the beautiful view out the window. The room wasn’t extravagant or anything, but I’m not too picky when it comes to such things, if it serves my purposes then it does fine in my book. Eventually I got spiffed up in my nice clothes and headed toward the south end of the strip, itinerary in hand. Yes I’m obsessed about these types of things, I like doing the maximum amount of stuff in the minimum amount of time. I’m not a tightwad though, well I am at times, but I’m also capable of going to a theme park with someone who isn’t quite so gung ho, and just wandering around doing whatever. When given the choice though, I’d rather have the most fun possible. :) The first thing on my list was picking up tickets for the show I was seeing that night at the New York New York, and then checking out the Shark Reef at the Mandalay Bay, which was quite cool. I’d never seen a golden alligator before (there’s only like twenty in the world or something), and at one point you’re in a glass tunnel with gigantic sharks swimming above, below, and all around you. The windows were floor to ceiling in many sections, and at times the sharks would swim right up to them, to the point you could see every row of teeth when they party opened their mouths to grin at you. I was glad there was glass there, anyway. At $14.95 it was quite expensive though, there were cheaper exhibits at other hotels of different kinds of animals and wildlife that were just as good.

I’m going to be including prices along with my personal opinions on the different attractions and stuff I did, just so those planning trips themselves can decide whether its worth it or not and make decisions about what to see and what not to. Its going to seem like I spent a truckload of money, and basically I did, but this was literally a once in a lifetime experience for my 21st birthday, and to me worth every penny.

After the Mandalay Bay I took the tram over to the Luxor, the pyramid shaped casino with the huge spotlight shining over the top each night visible from miles away. The tram station led right out under the huge Sphinx, was a pretty neat effect. One thing I didn’t do during my trip was take any pictures, I figured since I was by myself there wasn’t really any point, and the different sights would live on better in my memory. If I ever go back with family or friends I’ll be sure to be hammering away at the shutter button though. :) My plan was to see Beauty and the Beast at the IMAX theater there, but it turned out the last showing of it had been the day before, and had been replaced with a different film. I was bummed, that was one of the only Disney movies we didn’t have on VHS back in the day, so I’d only seen it once or twice, and I’d never been to an IMAX theater and wanted to see what forty thousand watts of sound or what not sounded like. :) It turned out okay though, I ended up spending some of the extra time hitting up the casino downstairs, and finding a machine called Little Green Men much like the ones at the Chumash casino here, but with notable positive differences such as the bonus lines working right to left as well as left to right, and payment amounts being higher. Mobbed those machines of fifty bucks or so, and the Luxor was where I first discovered the Razzle Dazzle machine, taking fifty bucks off it too on the way out over to the New York New York.

It was there that I’d managed to snag front row seats to Lord of the Dance at 9pm, a show just about everyone has heard of as being Michael Flatley’s personal spinoff of Riverdance, the wildly successful Broadway show that originated in Ireland, and is based on traditional Irish dancing, most notably their style of tap. Now I’ll admit this type of show isn’t everyone’s cup of tea, but I’ve always been amazed by that type of dancing, where their feet move at a mile a minute and the clicking seems almost continuous at times. The performance was similar to the original one starring Flatley in Ireland, but of course had different performers in the starring roles, all of which were just as talented if not even more so. There were also some different scenes and variations on the theme, all of which I thoroughly enjoyed. The two fiddlers were very cool, they came down off the stage and were chatting with the front row, smiling away as their bows moved like the wind. The sound system in there seemed incredible, possibly because I was close to the speakers, but whenever the bass boomed you could literally feel your seat vibrating, and your heart vibrating in your chest. Was almost like that one scene in Jurassic Park where they realize the T-Rex is coming from a distance. My favorite part of the show as most people would agree was when the entire cast lined up at the end and hammered away right on the front of the stage, speeding up continuously until the ending crescendo. The audience went crazy, and enough people were yelling encore that they redid the final sequence one more time, with the audience on their feet clapping along in time. The energy in the room was great, I ended up whistling the main theme for the rest of the night.

I walked next door to the Monte Carlo and this is where the “Hurry Up and Win” strategy became most apparent, as I needed to catch a taxi to my 11:30pm dinner reservation and see if “the one” was waiting there for me. It was about 10:45 when I walked in, and what can I say, every time I tried to pop one more bill in and leave it multiplied, reproduced, had grandkids, and continued to make me rich. It was unfortunate, as there were about ten Razzle Dazzle machines there, and I only managed to rob four or so for mad cash before I literally HAD to jog towards the lobby. That was the most of those machines at any casino, so if you’re wanting the big bucks, head there. :) Eventually I did make it to the taxi though, and he took the freeway route and got me to the Stratosphere with five minutes to spare. Its quite a walk from the lower casino to the tower elevators, as you have to walk through this meandering path of about a hundred shops and tourist traps, as they try to weasel as much money out of you as possible while you’re there.

The service I received during the entire dining experience while at the Top of the World rotating restaurant atop the Stratosphere absolutely astounding. There’s a private podium downstairs where they check you in, and once your name matches a reservation you’re whisked up an escalator to a private elevator. The elevators in the Stratosphere tower are double decker, with television monitors in them showing you the interior of the one immediately above and below you. It was just myself and the worker in mine, while the one heading for the observation deck below us was crammed with like fifteen people. I giggled. At the top I made a quick stop in the restroom to make sure I was as spiff as could be, and made my way out to the area to make my appearance known. After fielding the “Um, is anyone else going to be dining with you?” question, and realizing that alas, my call to the world had gone unanswered, the young woman led me to my table. It was during this walk that I must have looked like an absolute idiot, due to the fact that as I came around the corner I finally noticed the view, and stopped in mid stride with my mouth gaping open. The height of the restaurant is about a thousand feet off the strip, and you can see just about all of Vegas from up there. The colorful hotels and signs of the strip lit up like a Christmas tree, and it was quite clear how the restaurant coined its name. Eventually I recovered enough to chase down the woman and arrive at my table, which luckily was right on the edge of the room, literally a foot from the window and the thousand foot gap to the ground outside. The entire area the tables are on rotates completely around about once an hour, so its almost unnoticeable unless you stare at one spot enough. The inner area where you entered and where the kitchen is at remains stationary as does the outer windows, but during the course of the meal you end up getting to see Las Vegas in every conceivable direction, at a height high enough you can basically see the curvature of the earth at the horizon. My waiter was possibly the most ideal waiter you could possibly ask for, I’ve never felt more like royalty than I did during the meal. I knew it was going to be quite the experience when he asked me if “regular” water would be okay for the evening. I was starving having not eaten much of anything all day, knowing I was going to have possibly the most exquisite meal ever that night. I’m grateful I was, because I ended up stuffing myself to the brim. The foods all had really long names and are really hard to describe, the kind that the presentation is almost as important as the taste, and you don’t even want to eat them because they look so pretty. :) The appetizer was jumbo shrimp scampi in like a cream sauce, with these weird triangle shaped pastry things sandwiching them, by far the best shrimp I’ve ever had. For the main entrée I ended up enjoying a type of sea bass which is basically indescribable, it was in this delicious sauce and garnished with yummy spices. Okay this is lame, I can’t think of good enough adjectives to describe the food. I feel like I’ve used the word amazing like eight hundred times. I guess I’ll just say the taste of the dinner as a whole was utterly FABULOUS. Dessert was this ice cream apple tart creamy pastry thing that was not only huge, but utterly beautiful. Yet another time a camera would have been great, because the creation ended up way, way, down in the bottom of my stomach. Well actually the top, since the rest of the meal had filled up the rest. I ended up sticking around a while even after I was done eating, just to stare at the view and daydream. The nice thing about the restaurant is they let you ride the elevator up to the indoor and outdoor observation decks free of charge, when the general public pays eight bucks or so. It was pretty deserted up there, as it was around 1am and very windy. I circled the outdoor deck at least three times, enjoying the feeling of being on top of the world staring out at a gigantic city of lights. There are only a few views that I feel can compare to that one, including the one from the top of Mt. Whitney, and the view that could formerly be seen from the top of the World Trade Center. The feeling of the wind in your face, your shirt flapping away, as you stretch your arms out and pretend to fly, is something any little kid (and some big ones) will always enjoy.

Eventually I reluctantly stepped back into the elevator for the return trip, and after a quick stint at the tables, padded off to bed after the most satisfying evening in quite some time. Alas, this was only the end of the first day however, and I had two more to go.